a fool's musings
Fool, said my muse to me,
look in thy heart and write...
Warning: Adult Content
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10.23.02 - 11:40 p.m.
It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown!
In the Pumpkin Patch is up on my site.
Enjoy.
Did I mention I started my Christmas shopping? I did. I took care of my youngest niece, and also got a couple things for her older sister and for my brother. Not in the same store, obviously.
I love buying little girl clothes. They're so little and adorable.
I was in another store looking for something for my eldest niece (12) and the juniors stuff is so heinous that it's not even funny.
Someone should shoot the people who bring us "fashion" each season.
I think I should update my wishlist at Amazon to add all the things I want but am not buying.
Sigh.
Made a couple new Rogue icons tonight. That was fun, yet frustrating. I have no graphical skills and no patience lately to learn.
I need to get back to learning CSS as well, so I can (someday) redo my site, probably to match this diary.
Of course, by that point, I'll probably want to change the layout here.
Such is life.
Come on, Giants. Hold onto the lead. Woo! They won.
~victoria
[current mood: sleepy]
[current music: World Series in background]
[random quote: \"I'm from the country of Leone. It's Italy pretending to be Montana.\" Xander Harris, BtVS]
~*~
10.23.02 - 12:53 p.m.
yet another survey on writing
I kept meaning to do this and then forgetting about it.
I have no recollection of whose LJ/diary I saw it in. Sorry.
1) When you have a new idea for a story, do you begin to write it immediately or do you let it sit and mellow a while before you start on it?
Depends on how the idea shows up. If it's dialogue or actual verbiage for the story, then I start writing ASAP, because I'm afraid of losing it.
If it's just the *idea*, per se, then I write myself a note like, "Rogue loses her memory, disappears. Logan runs into her again years later. She still doesn't remember him. What happens?"
2) Word processed or handwritten?
Depends on where I am. If there's a computer available, typed. If not, handwritten in my Handy Dandy NotebookTM
3) Do you write fic in a fandom because you're wanting to write fic in that fandom? Or do you start with a general theme or idea you want to explore, and then select the characters and fandom that best suits to explore the concept?
I follow sparkage.
If a character or couple sparks for me, I write them.
I don't choose fandoms so much as they choose me.
Let me rephrase. I don't choose to *write* in fandoms as much as they choose me.
I mean, I love Alias. I loved X-Files and Homicide, and even ER for a couple seasons. But I have no ideas, no spark to write in them.
I mean, yes, I did write a HLotS fic (Only Human) because I woke up with Mikey's voice in my head saying, "It wouldn't *be* Bayliss, huh, Frank?" because I was so upset by the Box scene in "Fallen Heroes Pt 2" even prior to "Forgive Us Our Trespasses" or The Movie.
And I enjoyed writing Kellerman PI in Lost and Found, but I don't think I have any HLotS-fic left in me. I think it's also why I don't write much BtVS/Angel stuff, nor much Smallville. I enjoy the shows a lot (even now with BtVS/Angel having fallen from their peaks), but the characters don't ping with me.
On the other hand, Logan and Rogue - I feel like I'm still finding new angles and new places to take them (even if it's not yet reflected in the fic I'm producing. I do have several long works in progress that aren't the usual "Logan comes home. Angst about Jean/Remy/whoever. Revelation. Sex." which is my usual L/R formula).
And other characters just jump up and demand to be heard - Snape in the Snapefic, Boromir in Absolution, Obi-Wan in Childish Things - I never, ever planned on writing HP or LotR fic. Ever. And yet...
So while my themes are typically the same in whatever fandom I end up writing in (forgiveness, miscommunication/the importance of communication, growing up, learning how to relate to others, power imbalances becoming balanced), I don't go in looking to write those themes. The stories that jump me are about that stuff in relation to the characters who resonate with me.
4) Do you talk about the story as it unfolds, or do you keep it tightly held to your chest until it's finished?
Do you read my diary/LJ? *g*
I am the queen of talking about what I'm writing. I try not to give *too* much away, but yeah, I'm all over the place talking about it.
Perhaps that's detrimental in some ways -- maybe it makes me bored with the story the way outlining does -- but when I'm excited, I like to share and squee about what I'm excited about.
Of course, there's been a lot less of that lately, but whatever.
5) Do you write out large chunks of the story and then go back to edit it, or do you write small sections and polish them one by one?
Depends. Usually I write in large chunks that are edited as I go (my agonizing over which word to use is quite... agonizing, really), and then I'll go back over and re-edit before starting the next part.
If I'm blocked on what comes next, then I'll revise and edit and polish and revise until I'm sick of the story.
6) Do you have to have a title before you can begin to write? Or do you chose your title afterwards?
I don't *have* to, but I prefer it.
I have a bunch of titles that need stories to go with them, as well.
Unfortunately, those titles never seem to fit the rare stories I have that don't come with a title full-blown upon arrival.
7) How much research, if any, are you likely to indulge in before beginning a story?
Huh. Depends on what the subject matter is.
I'll research cities I've never been to, and also medical, historical and military facts. Also, I'll look up quotes/references if I'm planning to use them.
8) What is your writing strength, and what is your weakness?
Strengths: dialogue (internal and external), characterization, word choice and flow, technical skills (grammar, punctuation, etc.)
Weaknesses: Rushing the endings, description, plotting, action scenes.
How does knowing your greatest strength and weakness affect how you plan your story/ the direction the story takes?
Plan? What is this "plan" of which you speak?
Seriously, though, yes, if I know an idea I have is going to be plot-heavy, I discuss it ad nauseum with my betas. If I know I'm going to need action scenes, I agonize over them and also apply to the betas for help.
If there are going to be complex plot twists that I need to keep track of, I write copious notes.
Which could be why I never finish these stories - I do much better on the fly, just writing until I hit the end.
9) Do you write to music? If so, how much does the music you are listening to affect the mood of your story?
I listen before writing, and sometimes while editing (and actually always have the radio on at work when I write), but I need quiet usually to write.
However, the music definitely influences me. Many, many of my stories are inspired by music.
And if I need to get in a mood for a certain scene or fic, I'll choose my music accordingly.
10) Do you try to incorporate quotes, snippets of song lyrics, poems, etc. at the beginning of your story? If so, why? How do you choose them?
Sometimes. I think it can be too much to have a whole song or poem, and certainly not interspersed with text unless they're chapter headings, but a line or three can work to set the tone or the mood or just give an overall impression of what the story is about. (See Crave for what I consider a good example of this).
11) If you are about to write a story about a character or pairing that you have never done before, and are not particularly familiar with other stories written in the same vein, would you avoid stories written about this pairing until your story was complete, or read everything you could find to see how others handled the idea?
Probably.
I don't like being influenced by other fanfic writers. I mean, sure, it happens, and sometimes it's good, but you need to have your own voice, you know?
12) Do you have a muse? Is it an evil muse? Or are you museless?
Heh.
There are some who'd say I'm museless, no doubt, but I like to anthropomorphize the voices in my head. Yes, I 'hear' the characters speaking to me. Wanna make something of it?
13) Who is the first person you are likely to show your story to? Is there someone whose opinion means more to you than anyone else?
My gusys (sic). Jen, Meg, Pete, Dot and Melissa.
Possibly Dot's opinion means more simply because she shares it so infrequently, but that's a matter of scarcity, not a value judgement on the others.
Since they're not really in my main fandom(s), I also like to bounce stuff off of Beth and Jenn and DevilDoll.
14) If there is a character that you particularly dislike, do you try to write a story about that character?
Yes. Intentionally in one case, sort of simply by chance in a couple others.
If so, how does your dislike affect characterization?
I like to think it doesn't. I work very, very hard not to let my dislike color the characterization too much. I try to be fair.
Do your feelings about the character change after you have written about them?
Yes and no. I feel like I have a better understanding of, say, Jean Grey or Boromir, because I've written from their POV, but generally, it doesn't make me like them. I just don't hate them anymore.
15) What are you doing answering this not-survey when you should be writing fic!? Shoo!
Heh.
You're right. I better get on with the watchfic before DD skins me.
~victoria
link
[current mood: hungry]
[current music: It's Not Easy - Five For Fighting (rolls eyes)]
[random quote: just need a hand that I can hold onto / When it's darker than death out there]
~*~
10.22.02 - 10:46 p.m.
Plan B... sort of
Grr... am having computer troubles tonight.
I hate that!
Anyhow, in a few minutes I'll head on over to LJ to witter about Buffy (good) and Smallville (some good, some laughable), but to reward DD's patience and Logan!Muse's... semi-cooperation, here's a small bit of watchfic:
***
At dinner that night, Rogue picked listlessly at her green beans. Scott had reported back to Jean, who'd told her about Logan's response. She hadn't expected anything less from him, but still, it was depressing.
Jubilee thumped her plate down onto the table next to Rogue's and winked. Rogue held her breath. This wasn't going to end well, she had a feeling, but she was committed to Plan B, at least for the moment.
"You coming dancing with us tonight, chica?" Jubilee asked, breaking into her thoughts.
"Uh--" She saw Logan enter the dining room. Their eyes met, and he looked away first.
"Come on, Rogue. You've got to start going out. You can't wait around for Wolvie." Jubilee's voice was pitched so that there was no doubt in anyone's mind she wanted Logan to hear the conversation. "Why do you want him anyway? He's so old! He's -- Ow!"
Logan turned and walked out. "You're not helping," Rogue said through gritted teeth, before hurrying after him.
"Logan--" She got the raised eyebrow in response. She took a deep breath, blew it out. "She didn't mean it."
"She's right, kid. I'm too old for you." He started walking again, and she stood helplessly, unsure of what to say. At the door he turned and said, "If that's Plan B, I'm not impressed."
She growled in frustration and muttered, "Dammit, Jubilee, if you've ruined this, I'm going to kill you."
***
Rogue, Jubilee and Jean met over ice cream to plan out a strategy, since Rogue no longer trusted Jubilee's approach to their mission.
"Jubes, I swear to God, I *told* you the age thing has him all freaked out. And what do you go and do but mention how he's too old for me!" She poked the air violently with her chocolate-syrup coated spoon. "I could kill you!"
"That was a bit of a miscalculation," Jean said, laughing, "but I'm sure you've got something in mind to fix the damage, right, Jubilee?"
Jubilee nodded. "Oh, yeah," she said. "Not to worry. It's all under control." She looked at Rogue. "Sprinkles?"
"Please. And how do you mean, 'it's under control'? If tonight was anything to go by--"
"Rogue, baby, calm down," Jubilee said. "Trust me."
"I hate when people say that to me."
"Look, you just follow my lead, okay?"
"Not if it leads where it did tonight, Jubes. I keep following you, I'm going to be driving Logan away instead of luring him close."
"Luring?" Jean asked with a grin, looking up from her bowl of Dulce de Leche.
"You know, with her feminine wiles," Jubilee said.
"Oh, God," Rogue muttered, rubbing her forehead wearily. "I'm doomed."
***
Logan was working on the motorcycle when Jubilee found him.
"Look, Wolvie--"
"Don't call me that."
She ignored him. "I'm really sorry about yesterday. I totally don't think you're too old for Rogue. In fact, I think she needs somebody old, because she's got old guys in her head."
He raised an eyebrow. He got the feeling she was supposed to be apologizing, but she was almost as bad at it as he was. She looked at him expectantly, but he gave her nothing.
"Come on, you know you've got the hots for her."
He turned back to the bike. If he wasn't going to discuss it with Cyke, who was at least old enough to drink, he *certainly* wasn't going to spill his guts to this teenager, even if she was trying to help Marie.
Teenager.
God, everywhere he looked, he had reminders that he was older than dirt (even if he didn't look or feel it) and Marie was eighteen.
And this kid was right. He had the hots for her. He growled menacingly, but Jubilee wasn't even fazed.
"Since she bought you the watch, I think you should reciprocate and buy her something nice," she was saying when he tuned back in.
That idea struck a chord in him. He could give her a gift. There was nothing wrong with that. And she had gotten him the watch, which he'd grown attached to in the few days he'd had it.
"What did you have in mind?"
"I'll take her shopping. You give me the money, I'll get her something nice."
"And how do I know you're not just looking for someone to finance your own shopping spree?"
She looked outraged. "Would I do that? Rogue is my best friend! I'm trying to help her out here, and to make up for yesterday."
"You want to make up for insulting me by making my give you money. Yeah, I'll really go for that."
"Look, I'll bring you back the receipts for everything we buy. Trust me," he growled in response to those words, so she hurried on, "it'll make Rogue happy."
He rose in one easy movement, reached into his pocket and brought out his wallet. "Here," he said, counting bills out into her hand. "Three hundred bucks. You *better* spend it all on her, get her some nice shit, or you and me will have some words."
She hugged him and was gone before he had a chance to react.
"Thanks, Wolvie!" she called over her shoulder. "You won't regret this!"
"I already do."
He went back to work, hoping that at least Marie would get something nice out of all this, and that she'd forgive him if he hurt her.
***
There. Happy now?
~victoria
link
[current mood: content]
[current music: silence]
[random quote: I don't mind the sun sometimes the images it shows I can taste you on my lips and smell you in my clothes]
~*~
10.22.02 - 11:50 a.m.
In the Pumpkin Patch
Pure silliness. Written on the fly this morning.
Clark. Lex. Pete. Chloe. Pumpkin picking.
I *said* I would do it.
See? This is me writing happy Smallville fic. Take a good long look, 'cause I don't think it'll happen often.
~*~
In the Pumpkin Patch
"Pumpkin picking?" Lex asked. "You've got to be kidding me, Clark."
Clark mock-pouted. "It's a Smallville tradition, Lex. I thought you wanted to be a part of the community."
"I see what you're doing. You're using my own words against me." Clark nodded, a big, goofy smile on his face. "You're lucky I like you."
Clark leaned in close, his lips right next to Lex's ear. "How much do you like me?" he whispered, his hand skating down Lex's back to land on his ass.
Lex turned into the embrace, lips quirked in a half-grin. "Enough to go pumpkin picking with your friends."
"But not enough not to make fun of me the whole time?" Clark's lips were against his now.
"Not quite," Lex answered before ending all conversation.
***
"The pumpkins aren't even on the vine," Lex said in disgust.
"There was a drought, Lex. They had to fly the pumpkins in from Canada," Chloe said.
"I came here expecting to pick a pumpkin off the vine. I think we should sue them for false advertising."
"There's no shortage of gourds," Clark said, changing the subject before Lex could get them all into trouble with the local Chamber of Commerce. He led them into one of the tents where gourds and other produce were on display.
"Gourds?" Lex asked warily. "I gave up hallucinogenics when I turned twenty-one, Clark. Reality is strange enough. Especially around here."
"What?"
"Gourds. Peyote-- forget it."
They wandered the aisles of the display quietly for a few minutes. Chloe stopped every few feet to sort through baskets of tiny gourds.
"Hey, this one looks like a duck," she said, and Lex had to agree. It certainly did.
"This one looks just like a snake," Clark said. Someone else had obviously agreed, and draw eyes on either side of what would be the head.
Pete sorted through the basket and picked up a knobby gourd about six inches long and one inch thick. "And this looks like a --"
"Pete!" Chloe gasped, blushing. She smacked his arm.
"What? I'm just saying--"
Pete, Lex and Clark exchanged mischievous glances.
"I was just going to say it looks like a, uh, a really long, uh, finger!" Clark said.
"A finger?" Chloe repeated, skepticism overcoming embarrassment.
"Yeah. A really long, er, finger."
"It doesn't look like a finger, Clark! It looks like a penis!"
Unfortunately for Chloe, just at that moment there was one of those lulls in the conversation when everyone goes quiet at once. Her voice carried through the tent, and everyone in the place turned to look at them. Chloe turned fire-engine red and clapped a hand over her mouth.
"Why doesn't the ground ever open up and swallow you when you need it to?" she muttered.
"What was that about swallowing?" Pete began, but she shot him the Look of Death and he immediately subsided.
Lex was not so easily cowed. "And how would *you* know what a penis looks like, Chloe?"
"Last week's Biology lesson," she said, raising her chin.
Lex turned to Clark. "You weren't involved in this -- biology lesson, were you, Clark?" His voice was low, dangerous.
"Uh--"
"What if he was?" Chloe challenged.
"Chloe! You told me you were over Clark--" Pete began, then stopped. "Lex, why do *you* care if Chloe and Clark --" he stopped again, unable to finish the sentence.
"I don't like my boyfriend having... biology lessons with someone else," Lex said.
"Clark is your boyfriend?" Chloe's voice once again rose above the crowd noise, causing them to be the center of attention.
"Damn," Pete muttered. "Not only an alien, but gay too?"
"Pete--" Clark warned, pulling him off to the side.
"He doesn't know?"
"Not yet. I'm going to tell him soon."
"Good luck with that."
"Can we not discuss this now?" Lex asked through gritted teeth, his eyes locked on Clark and Pete's whispered conversation, which was obviously meant to exclude him.
"So, Clark, when were you going to tell us?" Chloe asked. "I mean, it's not like we're random strangers. We're only your best friends."
"Hey, that's right," Pete interrupted before Chloe could work up a good head of steam. "If Lex is your boyfriend, does that mean I'm still your best friend?"
Lex held up a hand. "I'm still waiting for an answer to my question, Chloe."
"No, of course it wasn't with Clark, you ninny," she said. "Pete and I have been, uh--"
"You and Pete!" Clark interrupted. "That's great. I'm so happy for you. Especially after the whole gun thing."
"Gun thing?" Pete asked while Chloe made 'cut it out' gestures behind him.
"Uh, nothing," Clark said, grabbing the nearest gourd and turning it over in his hands.
"That one's kind of... phallic, too," Chloe teased, and he dropped it like it was on fire. She took Lex's arm and started walking again. "So, are your intentions honorable? Because if you hurt Clark, I'll kick your ass."
Clark and Pete hung back. "Are you okay with this, Pete?" Clark asked. "I know it's kind of weird--"
Pete snorted. "Clark, I know I got a little crazy about the alien thing, but this? No big. My Uncle Andy is gay. And I mean like, John Waters, not Rock Hudson, you know? So if you're happy--"
Clark smiled. "Yeah, Pete. I'm happy. And you and Chloe?"
"We're happy."
"Okay, then. Let's go home and carve some pumpkins."
And while Pete's back was turned, Clark pocketed the two phallic gourds. You never knew when Lex might want to try something crazy.
end
***
Okay, it's so light it might as well be made of gossamer, but still... Happy! No angst! And phallic gourds!
The strange thing? I was on this whole phallic gourd thing before I ever knew about the... potato. Or the asparagus.
Hive mind at work again. In very, very strange ways...
Now, since DD's found me a Jubilee!Muse, I suppose I better get back to the watchfic before she kills me.
~victoria
link
[current mood: silly, sick]
[current music: Born to Run]
[random quote: the highway's jammed with broken heroes on a last chance power drive everybody's out on the run tonight 'cause th]
~*~
10.21.02 - 11:58 p.m.
Wet on Water update
Like Wet on Water - 3000 words of locker room sex between Rogue and Logan.
'Cause Jubilee stole their clothes.
*snicker*
Well, *I* thought it was funny.
Still feeling unwell.
Spoke with M. tonight. She's pregnant. Woohoo!
She's only about 6 blocks away from here, which is damn cool. So we're supposed to get together next week with all the old crowd, but she may stop by sooner to see the apt.
Instead of writing watchfic tonight, I watched the Rangers fall apart against Tampa and did filing.
I hate filing.
It's one of those things that should be against my religion, but unfortunately, unlike running or eating veggies, I can't seem to eliminate it from my life.
So I filed old bills and tax returns. 2001. Tomorrow I'll do 2002, and I should be okay then.
Everything prior got pitched (except tax returns. those you keep for 7 years. Everything else, current +1 is all I keep).
Still stuffy-headed and ishy feeling.
I hate having a cold. I really hope it doesn't deteriorate into bronchitis. That would suck.
Sigh.
~victoria
link
[current mood: sick]
[current music: silence]
[random quote: \"I'm an extraordinary bitching pain in the ass.\" Beau Felton, HLotS]
~*~
10.21.02 - 4:48 p.m.
phallic gourds and pumpkin picking
I don't know if you've guessed, but I am not what one would call an outdoorswoman.
I mean, I love the beach and hanging out in the backyard. I don't mind a nice hike every now and then, or a nature walk.
But a *farm*?
Hello - there's a *reason* I live in the city.
I show up at my sister's and they all take one look at my sneakers, which are backless, and are like, "Uh, don't you have boots? There's going to be mud and muck and stuff."
Joy.
So I go back to the parents' and change into my black ankle-boots.
So yeah, we get to this farm out in Mt. Sinai, and the smell... let's just say that pigs and goats and sheep are just... smelly. Really smelly.
And the kids don't seem to have a problem with this, but I'm trying to get away as quickly as possible.
Then we get out into the field where the pumpkins are.
And they've already been picked. I mean, I thought "pumpkin picking" meant you got to pick the pumpkins off the vine.
Apparently not.
So the kids picked out pumpkins. They went on a hayride.
I avoided the tent with the bales of hay because it stunk to high heaven. The cornstalks also stunk.
I don't understand why no one else was bothered by the stench, but what the hell do I know?
I'm used to tar and diesel, urine and body odor, not manure and stale hay.
Then the kids got to pick out their little pumpkins. My eldest niece is big on the gourds. Amazingly, she didn't once pick up any of the phallic gourds, and let me tell you, there were *many* of them that could have *easily* doubled as sex toys.
The boys, of course, went right for them.
Boys and penii. What are you gonna do?
So that coupled with my standing in the field in my leather jacket, lavender fleecy and sunglasses, feeling incredibly out of place, along with Pearl-o's anti-'phobic Pete rant, got me thinking. I may have a happy Smallville bunny.
Not sure yet. Can't promise.
But there will be phallic gourds, and possibly some Pete.
Or not.
~victoria
link
[current mood: icky]
[current music: Cecilia - S&G]
[random quote: \"Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this!\" Tony Soprano, The Sopranos]
~*~
10.21.02 - 12:57 p.m.
'what we have here is a failure to communicate'
Also, yet again with the cliques. A subject about which I've written many times: this is a good place to start. Also, here, here, here, and here.
God, I talk about this a lot.
So yeah, that's what I said, Fred.
Read it, or not. Makes no nevermind to me.
The thing I wanted to talk about today was the free exchange of ideas, and how that's supposed to be what blogland helps with when mailing lists are too polite or too "ooh, pretty!" and newsgroups are too large or whatever.
The thing is this. Your LJ, your rules.
Yes.
We get that. God knows, I've invoked it often enough myself.
But - well, read this entry by Jintian on the subject of someone objecting to the sexualizing of the HP kids and then deleting the comments people made in response.
That sort of behavior is one reason I tend to copy my comments about the "big" fandom issues into my own diary, so if the post or the comments disappears, I have a record of what I said, so I don't have to reinvent the wheel when the topic comes up again in three months.
See, I didn't read the guy's post, and I'm definitely not one to point fingers about 'chan' or underage sex/slash, because hello? Logan/Rogue? Clark/Lex? Not exactly always with the legality, you know?
But I have problems sexualizing the HP kids simply because 1. when we meet them, they're eleven, which is WAY TOO YOUNG to be having sex; and 2. the actors in the film are the ages they're playing. Tom Welling is 25, looks 25, and is playing a somewhat convincing 15/16. But I know he's 25. Daniel Radcliffe is 12. And he looks 12. And the idea of him being sodomized by Alan Rickman is ... heinous to me.
Even with the aging up etc., I still imagine that little boy, that's Harry Potter to me now.
But anyhow, I don't like it so I don't read it so that's not my lookout. I'm not here to rant about underage sex and morality in fanfiction.
No.
I'm here to rant about people who don't have the courage of their convictions. People who post something controversial, sometimes even inviting flames (e.g., people who claim to be "putting on their flame-retardant suits" when they know they're posting something that will stir the pot) and then either act all offended or cut off all conversation when things get a little heated.
Have some fucking balls for chrissakes.
You can't have your cake and eat it, too. You can't go out on a limb and be all controversial and "bleeding edge" and then take it back when people disagree.
Or, rather, you can, but I, for one, will never again take you seriously as an interlocutor.
If you can't take the heat, don't enter the kitchen. Seriously. If you suddenly feel all put-upon and hated or something, and it bothers your ickle widdle feewings, so you friendslock the entry or, disable/delete all the comments, that just says to me you're not mature enough to handle debate; you're just a shit-stirrer or a troll.
Otoh, maybe you've had an epiphany and one of the people commenting actually made you think and *gasp* horrors! change your opinion!
And you're too embarrassed to suck it up and say, "Hey, So-and-So made me rethink my position, and you know maybe I was wrong. Or s/he was right. Or there's room in the world for more than just my opinion."
And that makes you childish, in my opinion.
If you can't say, "Hey, I was wrong." Or, "Hey, I disagree, but you know what, you make some salient points. Let's just agree to disagree and put a pin in it for now." Then what the hell are you doing even *saying* controversial things?
I mean, just squee over the BSO of your choice and post quizzes and leave the meta to the big people.
We'd all be happier that way.
And yeah, maybe I'm being overly harsh here, and as soon as I post this, I'll regret it or want to soften it or something, but you know what? I won't delete or friendslock or take down this entry or disable comments.
Because I own my rants. I own my opinions, even when they're ridiculous, irrational or just plain *wrong*.
And I think, if you want to play in the big meta- and multi-fandom sandbox, you ought to, too.
Whew.
~*~
Posted "Like Wet on Water" this morning. (Thanks for the title, DD, and for the concept, Naomi Chana. "Jubilee stole my clothes!" Hee!)
Now, to get back to the watchfic, before DD stirs up my Logan!Muse some more...
Whoops, forgot to close the bold and the small. Stupid html.
~victoria
link
[current mood: ranty, stuffy and sick]
[current music: Oye Como Va - Santana]
[random quote: \"There's nothing I won't do, but some things are gonna cost you extra.\" Mike Kellerman, HLotS]
~*~
10.20.02 - 11:08 p.m.
Call me Flem Snopes
Yesterday, I knew I was coming down with something, and I still feel that way today.
Throat hurts, sinuses achy and full, nose stuffy, mucus membrane in overdrive... I hate this feeling.
It's not enough to make me say I'm really sick and should stay home from work tomorrow, but it's enough to make me miserable most of the time while I'm awake, even with doses of Nyquil.
Sigh.
So pumpkin picking, the phallic gourds, and various other things will have to wait until tomorrow.
I'm going to bed.
Things I didn't get done that I wanted to do:
*finish watchfic
*make icons
*answer email
*do show reviews (Alias and Angel)
*beta for various
send 'Friday' Feedback on silverlake.
If I owe you email... it'll get done eventually. Really.
But now...
::curls up in fetal position and clutches pillow::
~victoria
link
[current mood: sick]
[current music: World Series in background]
[random quote: too icky to be witty]
~*~
10.19.02 - 10:59 p.m.
sacred whores and bookcases
This amuses me.
As if I'm as feared in any fandom as she.
I wish...
***
Instead of getting the bookcases I'd planned on, while sitting in traffic this morning, Daddy and I decided I should check out the cabinet-maker on my corner to see if they could custom-build me something for a reasonable fee.
And they can. And they will.
Maple. Natural finish. Adjustable shelves. 43" x 12" x 72" to fit perfectly in my little alcove, which shall henceforth be known as "the Library".
4 weeks delivery (they shouldn't even charge me, the bums. They could put it on a handtruck and roll it down the block. Which is apparently how my grandfather used to deliver the cabinets he made. Or rather, my dad used to wheel the handtruck. I asked him if the store we were in today was like Grandpa's store. He said yes, but bigger. I guess Grandpa didn't keep much stock on hand. He was well-known for his inlays and fancy trimmings.) and they'll deliver on a Saturday and install the thing. Which is good.
Hee!
I'm so happy.
***
Watched the first two eps of Angel this evening. I like Electro-Girl better on seeing the whole ep, I still want to beat Angel about the head with heavy sticks, and take Wesley home for some hot comfort nookie, and good lord, could Connor be any lamer.
He reminded me of someone, but I can't remember who.
And I'm so totally having vague ideas of writing "Angel tells Buffy he's in love with Cordelia" fic, which can't be a good thing.
Also, having just watched Graduation Day a couple weeks ago, similarities much? And how Wesley has grown from "The Council won't help. They have orders for you" to slashing his own arm to feed Angel blood when he's freaking out.
And of course, that Wesley!Woobie moment when Angel is telling hallucination!Connor he wants to kill him.
Sigh.
Tomorrow night: Vega$!
Heh.
I'll be taping it again, and watching Alias.
But, since I'm here, I can watch it right after Alias and not have to wait two weeks before I natter on randomly about it.
***
There's an interesting conversation going on on glass_onion about the character Inara on Firefly.
Now, I haven't seen enough of the show to be involved in the discussion on list, but I will say that I have serious issues with the character.
Anyone who's read my fiction knows I have *no trouble* with strippers, hookers, junkies and small-time hustlers populating my fiction.
What I *do* mind is when these lifestyles are glamorized or prettified, and that's what it looks like to me on Firefly.
I mean, yes, sacred prostitute - hello? Bab!Rogue that was never finished (though I do hope to get back to it) was about sacred prostitutes and the women of Babylon paying their dues at the Temple of Ishtar, and aside from the extremely fantasy-style sex, it was going to deal with Rogue's humiliation at not being chosen quickly, her family's reaction, Logan's reaction to meeting her again under 'normal' everyday circumstances after their encounter in the Temple - it wasn't just "ooh! prostitution is sexy!" though admittedly, there's something about the imbalance of power that I find erotic. - but the character seems (from the two episodes I saw) to be something of a Mary Sue.
She's smart, she's beautiful, she's highly trained, she's well-respected and loved by everybody. And she's a courtesan.
Even Madame Pompadour or um, that one who was Pericles lover back in ancient Greece - they might have been smart and influential, but they weren't easily accepted into society on the same level as their protectors.
Anyhow, the actress isn't that good, she's playing a character who needs a LOT more fleshing out (no pun intended), and to NOT be whitewashed as some kind of spiritual yet sexual saint.
Plus, Zoe and Kaylee (is that the mechanic girl's name?) are much more interesting, attractive characters, imo.
Ah well. What do I know?
I did so enjoy the Lilah/Wes scenes of Angel and I've got X2 pics for iconnage, so I'm happy. *g*
~victoria
link
[current mood: happy]
[current music: World Series in the background]
[random quote: I can still remember how that music used to make me smile and I know if I had my chance I could make those people dance ...]
~*~
10.18.02 - 3:54 p.m.
answers and pictures
In case you were wondering, my answers to the survey about my writing.
In other news, I'm trying to edit the porn but work keeps interrupting. Grr...
Oh well, train ride to the parents' tonight, so I can do it there, I guess, and type it up tonight.
Also, Khaki has oodles and oodles of new X2 pics from EW.
*thud*
~victoria
link
[current mood: drooling over Logan]
[current music: Jack and Diane - John Mellancamp (or John Cougar, as he was then. *g*)]
[random quote: hold onto 16 as long as you can turn around real soon makes us women and men]
~*~
10.18.02 - 9:21 a.m.
Hit me with your best shot
Since I am a masochist, and yet, also an egoist...
A survey, snagged from Alara Rogers:
Obviously, fill this out only if you've *read* my work and you generally like it.
1) What was the first story you read that I wrote?
1a) Did you like it or not?
1b) Why or why not?
1c) What do you remember most about it?
2) What story of mine do you like the best?
2a) Why?
2b) What separates it from the other stuff I wrote?
2c) What separates it from other stories like it?
3) What story of mine do you like the *least*?
3a) Why?
3b) What separates it from the other stuff I wrote?
3c) What separates it from other stories like it, if anything?
4) What about my writing style grabs you?
4a) What stories exemplify this style?
5) What type of story (not which characters) would you like to see me write?
6) Is there a specific character or situation you'd like to see me try my hand at?
6a) Why do you think I'd be good at it?
7) Is there anything, in your experience, that you think would help me fix a specific flaw in my writing?
Feel free to answer publicly, in the comments here or in the LJ, or privately, via email. I will answer all comers.
The big list of all my stories, in chronological order, can be found at the Chronology page on my site, up to and including Running to Stand Still and Kaddish, which was posted yesterday.
~victoria
link
[current mood: anxious]
[current music: Fool in the Rain - Led Zeppelin]
[random quote: bend me shape me any way you want me as long as you love me baby it's all right...]
~*~
10.18.02 - 1:10 a.m.
Tonight's Update
Updated the site tonight, putting up both Running to Stand Still and Kaddish.
Two fandoms in two days.
Damn I'm good.
I noticed that it's almost a year since I wrote my first Smallville fic. Damn, does time go fast or what?
Oh, and also, I finally found a link for Gingko by Pepper, the beautiful sequel to my own As I Lay Dying. Be warned though - the text isn't visible in Netscape 4.7. Style sheets or summat.
So I've written fic in 9 fandoms altogether - 10 if you count the as yet unedited/unrevised Snapefic.
And if you consider that Kaddish was almost Uncle Ben and Peter Parker instead of Jonathan and Clark Kent, that would have been 11.
Geez.
Who'd'a thunk it?
Certainly not I.
Sleep now.
~victoria
[current mood: sleepy yet accomplished]
[current music: random cars driving by]
[random quote: \"What's with him?\" \"He's engulfed by demons.\" Pembleton & Munch regarding Mikey on HLotS]
~*~
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The painting is "Boreas" by John William Waterhouse. Again, not a muse, but I like her. She suits the color scheme.
The quote is from Sir Philip Sidney.
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